The ConsumHERist - Words That Speak to Her

Posted on | July 30, 2008 |

By Delia Passi

Picture me (see photo below) telling you that I am excited to have the opportunity to serve you today. Now, picture a man you know saying the same thing. No big difference, right? Most men can say they are excited about an opportunity without feeling too much in touch with their feminine side.

Now change the word excited to the word thrilled and imagine each of us saying it. Big difference now, right? Of course, especially if the guy you imagined was the service manager for your local motorcycle dealer. Even if he is talking to a seven year old girl, he is likely to feel a bit off center telling her he is thrilled to help her. And I’m not about to suggest he talk that way to his women customers.

Language is much more the territory of women. Scientists have suggested that it was primitive women who had the most to do with the development of language skills. If men had been the leaders in language development back then, I’d say they’ve long since lost that lead. Women supposedly speak nearly three times as many words in a day as men. That is very easy to imagine. I think I say more in one day than my husband says in a couple weeks.

When you are selling to women, it is important to communicate with her in a style that is more like hers. Not just like hers, as we saw with the word thrilled, but using just a little more emotion in the words you choose. Use words like devoted, delighted, pleased, committed (try it) for positive points, or concerned, upset, frustrated or angry for negative points. It’s really okay for a burly carpenter to say “I’d really love to get you back in your kitchen this week…” It truly will make a difference, too.

Also, when you are listening to what she has to say (you are listening, aren’t you?), pay attention to the terms she uses so you can use them too. If she refers to her place of business as her “firm,” then don’t refer to it as her “company.” If she refers to her “children,” then don’t talk about her “kids.” It means something to her and it will register with her if she hears it back from you.

So try to speak her language, or just make small adjustments to make her feel more comfortable. Don’t go overboard so she wonders why you are talking so differently.

You’ll be thrilled by the results.

Next – Selling a Candidate

Delia Passi, Founder of WomenCertified® and author of Winning the Toughest Customer: The Essential Guide to Selling to Women is a regular columnist on eBrandMarketing. Want my take? Email me and visit my sites www.medelia.com, www.womencertified.com

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